2021 Masters: The Fried Egg Draft

Will: Garrett, Will, Meg, Andy is the order

Garrett: Dammit, this is so much pressure now. I’m going to choke and pick Finau.

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Will: Goodell is on the podium. Garrett, you’re on the clock.

Garrett: Pick 1—Jon Rahm. He’s got new-dad magic, and I feel like he’s the least likely of the top players to go randomly MIA. 

Meg: Got that Dad Perspective

 

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Andy: Taking the storyline that’s going to be beaten to death by Wednesday

Garrett: It will drive us crazy, and I’m here for it

Andy: Don’t forget he spoke out about green-reading books

Garrett: Also, here are his finishes on the PGA Tour this year: T-7, T-7, T-7, T-13, T-5, T-32, T-9, T-5

Will: Will gives that pick a thumbs up

Andy: Three straight top 10s at the Masters, too, and I don’t think we’ve seen his best there

Garrett: All right, this is going to take forever if we don’t move on

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Will: Pick 2—Dustin Johnson. Since 2015, he has only missed the top 10 when he has fallen down a flight of stairs. Normally I would think the defending champion might be exhausted by hosting the Champions Dinner, but I think that will be a minimal-effort affair for DJ.

Andy: Sandwiches?

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Meg: Pick 3—Jordan Spieth. Easy.

Will: Hell yeah

Andy: I can’t wait to watch Spieth shoot a 67 this week while it looks like he shot a 75

Meg: As an unapologetic member of the Golden Child Fan Club, a permanent passenger on the Cocaine Train, I can’t wait to see him win his second (feels like it’s his fifth) green jacket

Garrett: He’s magic at Augusta. I want to see him and Cam Smith have a duct-tape showdown on Sunday. Andy, pick Westy.

Will: Or else.

[Long pause]

Will: One thing we didn’t consider with this format is that there’s a decent shot we lose Andy’s attention

Garrett: ANDY!

Andy: I’m just putting together my thoughts!

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Andy: I’m taking my two favorite golfers. Pick 4—Justin Thomas. Pick 5—Bryson DeChambeau. Both have historically struggled with putting at Augusta National. They also use green-reading books as much as anyone on tour, and those aren’t allowed at ANGC. But my optimism is buoyed by JT’s stellar performance last year, when he played beautifully but was done in by a couple of bad mistakes. As for Bryson, he’s got a new protein sponsor, a new sub-prime loan sponsor, and a new driver, specially designed for him. I mean, what could possibly go wrong with the new driver.

Garrett: JT and Bryson are huge picks for the 4 and 5 spots

Andy: One is literally huge!

Will: I see the protein switch as a bit of a risk, but ANGC has plenty of facilities

Meg: I’m here for Bryson taking a good two minutes thanking his sponsors in Butler Cabin

Andy: Did you see he can’t fit all his sponsors in his Twitter bio?

Garrett: Do you think he demands extra to include a sponsor in the bio?

Andy: You know, Woosie is still available

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Meg: My next pick will provide some excitement on Thursday and Friday, and inevitably fade away on the weekend, but I’d love to see him battle Spieth on Sunday. Pick 6—Rory McIlroy.

Andy: Out-in-the-wilderness Rory. Literally any result wouldn’t surprise me.

4th Hole: 3-putt from 18 feet.
5th Hole: Tee shot finds swimming pool.@IanJamesPoulter is taking advantage of Rory McIlroy's slow start and is 3UP thru 5. pic.twitter.com/rhnvApdGOo

— PGA TOUR (@PGATOUR) March 24, 2021

Garrett: Meg, you just picked Spieth and Rory. It’s going to be an emotionally heightened weekend for you.

Meg: Maybe his Dad Perspective didn’t work in November because he deferred it to this April

Garrett: Good point

Will: Firmer conditions may help him. Doesn’t have to fly wedges exact distances and can be more creative (he says with stubborn hope).

Garrett: Not sure I’ve seen Rory leave many wedges short recently

Andy: I heard on Golf Channel that from 125 to 150 yards, he is something like +4 strokes on the season. Not great.

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Will: Pick 7—Patrick Cantlay. Very high floor, and while he hasn’t played well lately, I just don’t see him finishing worse than T-15. Also, he’ll likely win.

Garrett: When all is said and done, he’ll have a lot of career top 10s in the Masters

Andy: I love everything about Patrick Canlay except his pre-shot routine. Do you think he would look excited if he won?

Will: He looked happy when he won the Zozo last year

Garrett: Geez, calm down, Pat

Meg: If DJ can shed a tear at the Masters, maybe there’s hope for Cantlay

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Garrett: Screw it. Pick 8—Patrick Reed. Absolute serial killer.

Andy: What brand of shirts do you think Justine bought for him this week?

Garrett: He should wear pro-shop merch

Will: Even though he’s an honorary member, I don’t know that he’s allowed in the pro shop

Garrett: How is he not sponsored by PXG?

Andy: The apparel at the very least seems like a fit

Meg: Justine and Bob Parsons might not get along very well

Will: She might not like the “Science of Sexy” messaging

Garrett: “Two-time Masters champion Patrick Reed” is just a hilarious phrase to me. I truly hope it happens.

[Long pause]

Will: You can pick Finau now

Garrett: That was my other option

Will: Well, it’s still your pick #snakedraft

Garrett: Lol

Andy: Amazing I wasn’t the first to screw this up

Garrett: Fine. Pick 9—Tony Finau. Look, I know it’s not exciting. But if he doesn’t backdoor a top 10, I’ll be shocked.

Andy: Way to protect the points

Meg: No Par 3 Contest this year, too, so his ankles should be safe

Andy: Are we scoring this by courier points?

Will: ANGC exclusively uses UPS,* so no. (*Probably incorrect.)

Andy: So it’s UPS point this week?

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Will: After peer-pressuring Garrett into Finau… Pick 10—Xander Schauffele

Andy: Can’t believe it worked

Garrett: Meh, Xander has bee so-so lately. Very little juice.

Will: He’s so good off the tee. I trust him to be in contention on Saturday, then it’s a crapshoot.

Andy: This is nutty:

Garrett: He’s incredible in majors. I may have made a huge mistake. All right, next pick. Brooks, Brooks, Brooks…

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Meg: So I won the ticket lottery in 2017 for Wednesday, when the Par 3 Contest got rained out for the first time in years. Sergio went on to win the tournament. So with no Par 3 again this year, I’m going with a gritty Texan who’s been on the rise. Pick 11—Sergio García. I really want him to have another child and name it Nandina or Dogwood.

Will: Wow. A reach but I love it.

Andy: You aren’t worried about the Azalea Curse?

Garrett: Is Sergio still putting with his eyes closed?

Will: You act like that’s a hindrance

Meg: If Spieth brings back the “look at the hole” technique on short putts, I’d love to see those two crazy Texans put on a clinic on the greens out there

Andy: If it stays firm, I like the pick. Unfortunately you’ve chosen the wrong seasoned veteran.

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Andy: I can’t believe he’s still on the board. Pick 12—Lee Westwood. My next pick doesn’t matter because I just got the steal of the draft. Westy has been saving up all the near misses and heartbreaking beats for this one. After close calls at the Bay Hill and TPC Sawgrass, it took a hole-in-one to knock him out of the Match Play!

Andy: I am certain he won’t disappoint me this time

Garrett: No, it will all work out this time

Will: Certainly

Meg: Zero chance of heartbreak

Andy: Pick 13—Daniel Berger. He has played well here, and he seems to like competing with a chip on his shoulder. Not getting an invite to the Masters last fall despite being in the top 15 in the world seems like good motivation.

Garrett: Berger is always, always undervalued

Andy: Who would have guessed he’d have been the first Florida State golfer taken?

Garrett: Probably a better pick than Finau, to be honest. Am I next?

Will: No, Meg is up, then me

Andy: Woosie is still available…

Garrett: Mize, too…

Andy: Sandy and his suspenders…

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Meg: Pick 14—Sungjae Im. I have no recollection of him finishing second in November, but that has to give him some confidence this week. It’s just a matter of time before he feels like a guaranteed top 20 at any major.

Garrett: I love him

Just a big fan of the Sungjae aesthetic, that's all pic.twitter.com/aVaXNVSjjz

— Garrett Morrison (@gfordgolf) January 25, 2020

Andy: Fan favorite over here at TFE Headquarters

Meg: It was tough not to take Woosie. Hate leaving him out there for someone else to snatch up.

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Will: Man, I don’t know what to do. Throwing a dart here.

Garrett: Brooks, Brooks, Brooks, Brooks…

Will: Pick 15—Viktor Hovland

Garrett: Fair enough

Andy: Boring

Garrett: Can he chip?

Will: Just wait until he has to get up and down from short of the 18th green to win. That won’t be boring.

Andy: He hits it so well. First go-around at the Masters for him. Speaking of recently-turned-pro Cowboys, is Matt Wolff alive?

Garrett: Early death by two-way miss

Andy: Some say the two-way miss isn’t a thing

Will: Life support

Garrett: He turns 22 in a few days

Will: His brother’s name is Eli. Eli Wolff. Strong name.

Garrett: I’ve got two picks, right?

Andy: Yes, that’s how it works, Garrett

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Garrett: Pick 16—Scottie Scheffler. His first Masters was last year, and he finished T-19. Also notched a T-4 in the PGA Championship. Just a thoroughbred.

Andy: Big-time player. Throughout his career, he has always played his best in the biggest events.

Will: I thought about him but saw too many lefts in Austin to pull the trigger. And a few rights.

Garrett: The final match at the Match Play was brutal

Andy: I think he was thrown off by Motor Mouth

Meg: My game would suffer if I heard “Oh Billy” over and over and over, too

Garrett: My second pick is really tricky…

Will: Is it Phil?

Garrett: Pick 17—Cameron Smith. He’s an assassin at Augusta.

Will: Dammit

Meg: I like that pick a lot

Andy: If it’s firm, that short game is going to be handy

Garrett: Also, I just need someone on my team to root hard for

Andy: That’s a good point. I only have one really likable player on my team.

Garrett: I was thinking about going all heels just for fun, but then I choked and picked Finau. Brooks is still available, by the way. I’m about to tweet at him that he’s being disrespected.

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Meg: Pick 19—Bruce Koepka

Will: *Cupcake

Andy: Newly engaged man!

 

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Meg: Is there such a thing as Newly Engaged Perspective?

Will: He said that it hurts to walk down hills and that he was looking for the flattest routes around the course. Scary thought.

Meg: Yikes, hadn’t seen that quote

Andy: I’m not a doctor but doesn’t it seem strange that he has no problem swinging a club but is struggling to walk? How is that possible?

Will: Lateral movement good, stress on the knee going forward bad? (Also not a doctor.)

Garrett: He has been interestingly vague about how he incurred this latest injury

Will: My neighbor is a doctor

Andy: Garrett seems the closest to a doctor in this group

Garrett: I got about 80% of the way to a Ph.D. in English, so my thoughts about Brooks’s knees do carry a certain authority. Whose pick is it?

Will: Andy’s. We’re at the halfway point.

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Andy: He’s not going to win, but I already have the winner on my team, so it’s time to load up on top 10 machines. Pick 20—Paul Casey.

Garrett: Did you know he’s just four years younger than Lee Westwood? And five years older than Louis Oosthuizen? I have many of these interesting age-related facts.

Andy: Pick 21—Jason Day. Again, a machine at Augusta. And it seems he’s in relatively good health.

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Meg: A non-member of the PGA Tour is just too good of a storyline, so… Pick 22—Will Zalatoris

Andy: That would be incredible. Wonder if it would get him a nice Korn Ferry Tour exemption.

Will: Winning the Masters in order to be eligible for the FedEx Cup is a high bar to clear

Meg: We could have two major winners without status in less than a year. Zalatoris isn’t as big of an underdog as Sophia Popov, but him winning would be pretty unbelievable.

Garrett: He got into the field on world ranking, right?

Will: Correct

Garrett: He hits it so well

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Will: Speaking of which… Pick 23—Collin Morikawa. Wildly streaky putter, so I’ll take my chances that this is one of the good weeks.

Andy: How did we forget about him?

Garrett: He shouldn’t have dropped this low

Meg: I almost took him a couple of times

Andy: Not gonna lie, I’ve lost focus since I got Westy

Will: No. 4 in the OWGR, No. 23 in the Fried Egg Masters Draft

Andy: You don’t need to rub it in, Will

Garrett: Tron’s critique of his putting got in our heads

Andy: One of the internet’s best rivalries, Tron vs. Will

Will: That’s a one-sided rivalry

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Garrett: I have two picks, right? Pick 24—Webb Simpson. Maybe not a threat to win, but he’s an elite iron player, and I doubt he’ll miss the cut.

Andy: He’s played so well at the Masters recently. Two top 10s in a row. He talked about it last year, how he needed to approach Augusta differently.

Will: I wonder if he loves dogwoods as much as he loves doglegs

Garrett: Shoutout Acushnet

Andy: You taking Billy next?

Garrett: Nope, I’m looking for upside. Pick 25—Joaquín Niemann. Fantastic ball-striker, makes a ton of cuts. Missed last year’s Masters because of a positive Covid test, so there are some unknowns.

Will Knights: High risk, high reward

Andy: He is very good and only 22

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Will: Not overthinking this one. Pick 26—Matthew Fitzpatrick. He plays well on firm courses, and if we get a crispy Augusta this weekend, I love his chances of contending.

Andy: Hometown favorite!

Garrett: Go Wildcats

Andy: Will doesn’t want his neighbors to be upset with him

Meg: That’s a smart pick. Would be very surprised if he doesn’t make the weekend.

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Meg: Kind of risky going with another player who’s at his first Masters, but… Pick 27—Max Homa. He’s had such a solid year so far. Hope to see it carry over to this week.

Will: First *real Masters

Meg: Yes, yes, yes—thanks, Will!

Garrett: Yeah, Homa MC Hammered last November. He’s had a great 2021, though.

Meg: Gosh, the November Masters is just blank in my mind aside from DJ winning

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Andy: I’m surprised he’s still here, but I am convinced of two things: Adam Scott can roll out of bed and 1) look good and 2) contend at Augusta National. Pick 28—Adam Scott.

Garrett: Funny you’d use the word “roll” there

Meg: Adam Scott pulling off pleated pants is almost as impressive as his Masters win

Andy: And what the hell, I have a few guys who can’t putt. I’ll take another one: Pick 29—Hideki Matsuyama.

Every single @anwagolf winner has been followed by a @TheMasters winner from the same country. This is an auspicious sign. cc:@JustinRayGolf

— CanHidekiWin (@CanHidekiWin) April 3, 2021

Andy: I don’t understand how Hideki has never experimented with a different putting style

Meg: It’s wild he hasn’t majorly changed things up

Garrett: He even uses classic putter styles

Will: He thinks anything else would be against the spirit of the game

Andy: When is Frank Strafaci getting picked?

Garrett: Have you heard? Frank Strafaci made two appearances in the Masters

Andy: I have heard that. A few times. Today.

Garrett: These are interesting facts. People like these facts.

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Meg: I have enough likable guys on my team, so… Pick 30—Billy Horschel. “Oh Billy” himself. He’s been so good. I kind of hope he doesn’t win (sound strategy for a draft!), but I think he’ll contend.

Andy: I mean, his goals are to win all four majors and a Players

Will: Gotta start somewhere

Meg: Exactly. Let’s go, Billy!

Garrett: He’ll follow through on the promise of that T-4 in the 2013 U.S. Open any year now

Meg: Ugh, I hate that pick already

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Will: Pick 31—Marc Leishman. Feels like it’s time for him to win out of the blue again.

Andy: I see you are trying to win Tron over

Meg: An olive branch to your nemesis

Garrett: I think I’m next. Am I next?

Meg: That’s correct, Dr. Garrett

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Garrett: The theme of my next two picks is “tempo”

Will: Matt Jones!

Andy: Who?

Will: Ernie Els isn’t in the field, Garrett

Garrett: Pick 32—Louis Oosthuizen. Pick 33—Corey Conners.

Meg: Louis was on my short list

Will: Those are good picks. I like them very much.

Andy: Mr. CT Machine! Corey Conners might be the best all-around ball-striker on tour.

Garrett: Flushes it. Also, T-10 at last year’s Masters. And Oosty’s record in majors is well known.

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Will: Joining my squad next is… Pick 34—Tyrrell Hatton. No form to speak of or history at Augusta.

Andy: Woof. I don’t like his recent major record.

Will: Well, no, of course not

Andy: Feels like a top 10 player on a normal week and top 2,000 at a major

Garrett: He’ll turn it around in majors soon. Plus, we know he’s cool as a cucumber under pressure.

Will: Bryson didn’t have a top 10 at a major until 2020. People forget that.

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Meg: Sorry, washing machine repair guy just left. Pick 35—Shane Lowry. Hasn’t done great at the Masters, but it seems like he should do well, considering his ball-striking.

Garrett: In theory, Augusta suits him perfectly

Andy: He’s been playing well recently, too

Meg: Also, can someone ask Wikipedia to update his pic?

Will: Whoa

Andy: Unbelievable

Garrett: Cute!

Will: Okay, final picks

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Andy: Pick 36—Harris English. No history to date at the Masters, but he won at Kapalua earlier this year, another hilly course with uneven lies and sloping greens. Pick 37—Bubba Watson. He might win. You never know with Bubba.

Will: He got a lot of scouting done at the Drive, Chip & Putt, too. Saw how that 18th green is playing.

poor Bubba pic.twitter.com/VTqLFufPlZ

— deepfriedegg (@deep_fried_egg) April 3, 2021

Garrett: Does Bubba live in the Crow’s Nest?

Andy: Yep, since last fall’s Masters

Meg: But he wins only in even years

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Meg: Pick 38—Matt Kuchar

Will: Yuck

Meg: I know, I know

Garrett: You have Billy Ho and Kuchar!

Meg: Going with my head, not my heart. I think he’ll be top 25.

Garrett: Strong picks, but at what cost?

Andy: Has any player’s public image shifted more drastically than Kuchar’s after Caddie Gate?

Meg: I had to even out the likability factor after choosing Spieth and Rory!

Will: Listen, if you’re looking for a T-30, there’s no one better than Kuchar

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Will: I’m choosing a big left-hander who went to school in the south. Pick 39—Robert MacIntyre.

Andy: A true gentleman

Garrett: A sportsman

Meg: A scholar? I’d love to see him in the hunt this week

Garrett: And Bobby Mac seems to do well at majors. For my final pick…

Will: He’s only played in three!

Garrett: FOR MY FINAL PICK…

Will: Phil

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Garrett: Pick 40—Fred Couples

Will: Damn. Sorry, Phil.

Andy: Wow, nobody picked Wolff

Meg: Another tempo pick!

Garrett: Can’t believe he fell to me at the 40 spot

Andy: I can

Garrett: 61 years young, still filling the piggy bank with senior tour cash. I love Freddie’s chances this week.

Andy: The biggest snubs are Abe Ancer and Victor Perez. How does Abe not get picked after last year?

Garrett: Ancer was the right pick for me, and Perez looks like a good fit for Augusta

Andy: You took Fred Couples, remember that

Meg: I took Kuchar over Honest Abe. Feel pretty bad about it.

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Garrett: I think we’re done

Meg: I’ve got one last thing to leave you guys with. I’ve gone down the Wikipedia rabbit hole.

Garrett: Goodness

Meg: The OG Thicc Boi